Magical March 21: Corporate Bunny

Magical March 21

Corporate Bunny

Mark A Davis

A collection of former angels and former devils, former gods, humans, demi-humans and animals were gathered around a large marble conference table in a room without walls.  The sun was warm and bright.  Birds sang in nearby trees, and a cool breeze blew through marble columns.  It was a beautiful setting for what was, in reality, another boring corporate meeting for the Alpha Initiative in Nibiru.  At the head of the table sat Ysolde -- a beautiful former angel with white wings and long, straight lavender hair.  She was dressed in a flowing white gown -- which counted as button-down corporate attire in this place.  She was the immediate supervisor of Magical Guides division.

"I recalled you all back to Nibiru," said Ysolde,"so that we could update our progress.  I realized you are all very busy...."

"No kidding," Octava muttered.  "I'm trying to work on a magical girl as we speak...."  Octava appeared as a young boy with long blonde hair and cherub wings.

"Yes," said Ysolde.  "However, it has come to my attention that there has been some miscommunication and irregularities in fulfilling these assignments...."  She glared at Octava and Sita.  Both were suddenly quite interested in something in the trees above them.

"All I want to know," said Lakshmi, "is are we done yet?  It feels like we've been doing this forever...."  In her angelic form Lakshmi looked like a young girl with tanned skin, white cherub wings and pink hair.

"No, we are not even close," said Sita, a very beautiful angelic girl with long black hair and large white wings.  "We are currently working on Day 21, the theme of which is animal.  I guess Octava is doing that?  Also I believe Octava is still working out the details for Day 22, bedroom, and Icarus is working on something for Day 24, sci fi, but we are still effectively five days behind schedule."

"I'm so worn out," said Icarus.  "I can barely remember what we've done."  The former angel had dark skin, white hair, and jet black wings, and was dressed like a mid-70's rock star in leather and with a silk shirt open to the navel.

"Well, let's review, shall we?" said Ysolde.  "Day One's theme was favorite character, and Octava took the lead."  She studied the holographic display in front of her.  "You... transformed a thirty-year-old Hindu man named Edi Bedi into a  fourteen-year-old Japanese girl?"  She blink in surprise.  "Am I reading this right?"

"Sayaka Miki from Puella Magi Madoka Magica was his favorite character...." Octava said.  "Anyway, Magical Soldier Savitha is doing fine...."

"I'll let her guide speak for her," Ysolde said.  "Circe?"

A red-haired angel with pink wings perked up.  "Ah!  Yes.  She's doing fine!  We've ironed out all of the complications, she's fine with being a girl, and she's been protecting Providence, RI."

"Very good," said Ysolde.  "Although I caution against transforming adults into children, especially of the opposite gender."  She consulted her screen again.  "Now, for day two we had the theme of Pokémon, and I see that we empowered a young Pokémon fan named Sofia Alejandra Istallarte.  Merope?"

An animal sitting on the conference table itself -- a kind of half-bunny, half-squirrel with large blue eyes -- said, "Sofia can summon real Pokémon to aid her.  She's quite young, so she's been handling low-level magical girl stuff in Chicago parks... you know, stopping muggers, rescuing trapped pets, helping people find lost items...."

"It also says here that she's defeated an arch-duke of hell?"  Ysolde raised an eyebrow.  "Someone named Sargothrox?  Really?  A nine-year-old girl?  Can you please explain?"

"That... was not a real battle," said Merope.  "Just a fight in Pokémon Go -- the computer game.  Sargothrox is addict to it -- he visits the mortal world to play."

"I'm just going to run through a bunch of these quickly, since everything seems to be in order," said Ysolde.  "Day three was sun, and we have Claudia Sanchez of Los Angeles, CA who transforms into Sailor Sunburst.  Her guide is Daphne.  Day four was moon, and Sally Fisher is based in Seattle, WA and becomes Serene Moon Sally.  Her guide is Echo.  I understand the two girls have worked together...."

"They make a good team," said Echo, a dark-skinned angel with white hair and black wings.  "Especially since Sita did not give Sally any actual attacks...."

"Her sleep spell is an attack!" Sita exclaimed.

"Yes, very good," said Ysolde.  "Moving on, we have day five which was stars, and we have a young girl named Abigail Van Hoffen in Poughkeepsie, NY who transforms into Stella Maris.  Meili is her guide."  She nodded at a black cat with short demon horns.

"On day six the theme was pets," said Ysolde.  "Chantelle Williams of Boston, MA transforms into Pet Summoner Pretty Chantelle, and can summon three different pets...."  She stared at her screen for a moment.  "A ghostly white tiger named... Mittens?"

"She named them herself," said a cat with a sour look on its face.

Ysolde glanced at the cat.  She raised an eyebrow.  ""Really, Azelle -- Grumpy Cat?"

"Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal!" the cat exclaimed.

Ysolde sighed.  "Very well.  Day seven was on the theme of flower.  For this Daesdamona created a quite lovely floral magical girl, Little Miss Larkspur...."

"Her full name is Pretty Flower, Lovely Little Miss Larkspur," said Daesdamona, a cartoonish demonic girl with red skin, bat wings and horns.

"Yes.  And for this we picked a boy named Sean Patterson...."  Ysolde paused to glare at Octava.  "Who, I understand, mainly does flower blasts?"

Octava shrugged.  "Seemed like a good idea at the time.  And they work!"

"Lethe is her guide," said Ysolde.  She stared at a brown-furred bunny.  "Lethe?  Do you have anything to add?"

The bunny looked startled.  "Me?  My name is Austin...."

Ysolde looked confused.  Further down the table a similar bunny raised its paw.  "I'm Lethe," it said.  "Nothing much to report.  Miss Larkspur is keeping the streets of Kansas City safe...."

Ysolde was staring at the first bunny.  "Excuse me," she said.  "Austin, was it?  Whose animal guide are you?"

"Oh, I'm not a guide, the bunny said.  "I'm Magical Bunny Boy Austin.  Here, let me show you...."  With a simple transformation phrase, the bunny flew up into the air and spun about.  When he landed, he was mostly human -- a boy with bunny ears, dressed in a a typical Playboy bunny outfit -- fishnet stockings, high heels, and a strapless black leotard body suit, along with white cuffs at the wrists.  "Only, the outfit's kind of embarrassing..." he added, "so I like the bunny form better...."  With a poof, the boy transformed back into a brown bunny.

"Goodness," said Sita.  "Have we not dressed enough boys up as girls yet?"

"But," said Octava, "it's a bunny outfit... get it?"

Ysolde glared once again at the blonde cherub boy.  "Octava, you brought a magical boy to a Nibiru corporate board meeting?"

"Hey," Octava said, "I told you I was still working on this!"

"Oh, don't mind me," the rabbit said.  "Just pretend I'm a fly on the wall... only you know, I'm a bunny rabbit, and there aren't any walls...."

FINI